1. Anthony (第1季)【完整台词】

Maybe her breasts were tender.

And if she tragically lost her mother to the disease, she's got to go in and get it checked out.

And you're gonna take her there and be by her side.

The supportive, wonderful husband that you are.

Surely we can't just lie.

Did you think we'd resolve this without lying? 'Cause we can try that approach if you prefer.

Sorry, but how exactly am I supposed to get her to agree to this? With all due respect, I'm sure you've lied to your wife before.

You'll figure it out.

Look, just tell her that you love her.

And that you read an article about breast cancer rates, and you're worried.

And you don't want your kids to lose their mother.

You'd be surprised what people will believe if they want to.

God! What is What's wrong with me? Why do I do this? Hey, Anthony.

You can't It's a nightmare.

Hey, wow, okay.

(WHISPERS) You can't do this here.

And you're squeezing my hands.

Get Anthony, get off.

Get off.

Come on.

MELODY: Come on.

(TAPPING ON KEYBOARD) Come on (KNOCK AT DOOR) Hi, I'm the, uh, computer guy.

Hi! (STAMMERING) Hi, um, I'm Melody.

It's this one here.

I can't get it to work.

- Is this your computer? - No.

I'm just an intern.

Um, it's Robyn's computer? Robyn is my boss.

That's a pretty name.

Melody, not Robyn.

Well, Robyn's a pretty name too.

But, so What did you say the problem was, again? Okay.

Sorry.

It's like This thingy there? So when I move that, it doesn't move, so I can't Yeah, it's Just Sorry.

(TAPPING KEYBOARD) It's not switched on.

- Yep, that was really embarrassing.

- (LAUGHING) It just wasn't switched on.

And I didn't even think to change the I need you to book us somewhere for lunch.

Fancy but cheap.

Somewhere I'll like that won't give me bread.

What's Harry Potter doing here? I was just fixing a thing for Melody.

Yeah, it wasn't even switched on, so Don't worry about that.

It's always the switch.

(BOTH GIGGLING) (MOCKING GIGGLE) - Adorable.

Restaurant.

- Right.

(HISSES) Once you've done that, I want you to go through these for me.

What's this? It's Tinder.

You're not familiar with it? No, I know what Tinder is Great.

So go through.

Say yes to all the attractive ones.

But remember, you're matching with me, not you, so standards, high.

Be picky.

Nines and tens.

Working professionals.

No beards, no glasses, no tiger selfies.

If any of them message you, then you can discuss dinner.

Once they suggest a restaurant, Google it, look at the menu.

If you can buy a bottle of wine for less than thirty quid then tell them it's a no.

Keep Tuesday evenings free.

That's when I do Kundalini.

(PHONE RINGING) Yep? ROBYN: I'm still with Henderson.

Did you get the pictures? Um, yeah.

I was just trying to email you, but I couldn't get your computer to work.

So - Yes or no? - Right, yes, I think.

She said she would agree to sell them, but they're not gonna be cheap.

I didn't know how much money you had around, so That's fine.

He can afford it.

Look, I need you to book a mammogram for me.

A what? For For you? - No! Not for me.

For his wife.

- His wife? I'll text you the number of my guy in Harley Street.

He owes me a favor.

Okay, um What time do you Did he try and fuck you yet? Jesus! No, Eve! The man is having a breakdown.

Of course, he is.

Has he started crying yet? That's what tipped me.

Love seeing a man cry.

(SCOFFS) Eve.

Oh, come on, he must have done something.

He had his hand on my arse within three minutes.

Knob out in twenty.

Well, maybe he just recognizes that I'm more professional than you are.

Yeah, you're probably right.

Ciao-ciao.

(SNORTS) (BREATHES DEEPLY) - Sorry about that.

- It's fine.

But, you are paying for the hotel and that's mini bar whiskey so it's gonna cost you about term of your kid's school fees.

Well, best enjoy it then.

Hmm.

Things haven't been great with me and the missus.

We hadn't had sex for a year-and-a-half.

Anthony, I don't care.

It's a sickness, I'm an addict.

I can't help it, it's like diabetes.

Maybe you should stop putting your dick in so many cakes then.

You are a very cold woman, you know.

I'm not gonna feel sorry for you because you cheated on your wife.

I am a decent bloke, okay? Yeah, I messed around a little bit, but who hasn't? I don't deserve to be crucified for it.

Seriously, this shit is terrifying.

Everybody's got a story nowadays.