F R A S I E R (10x13) - Lilith Needs a Favor - Sorry.
I'm a nervous flyer.
Yes, I see.
Oh, you're white as a sheet.
No, actually, I'm always this pale.
My ex-wife used to say she could tell when I was embarrassed because I'd turn off-white.
I can empathize.
Sometimes after a late night, I covered my under-eye circles with Liquid Paper.
-So are you traveling to Seattle for business or pleasure? -Both, hopefully.
I'm relocating for work.
How about you? I need to ask an old friend for a favor.
-It's a long trip just to ask for a favor.
-It's a big favor.
-Well I hope your friend complies.
-It'll take some work, but -I'll get what I want.
-Oh, dear.
You two look awfully pale.
-Can I bring you something? -Not unless you have any extra melanin lying around.
-You should be a comedian.
-I've thought about it.
Dad? Dad, Dad! What? Are you hiding? I heard the key in the door, I thought Lilith might be with you.
-What's she coming for anyway? -Well, I don't really know.
She said she was flying across the country to ask me about something important.
She's being very mysterious about it.
-Is that her? -Well, no.
No, Dad, I'm not seeing her until tomorrow.
Well, let me know when she's coming, will you, so I can come up with an excuse to clear out.
Because I'm not good at winging it.
Oh, Lilith.
Hi.
-Look who's here, Dad.
-Hello, Martin.
Oh, time to go practice my signature.
Please, come on in, Lilith.
-So, I didn't think I was going to be seeing you 'til tomorrow.
Yes, I know that was the plan, but I just had to stop by on my way to the hotel.
What I'm here to talk to you about is not something one just drops on another person.
Please.
Frasier, recently a subconscious yearning has tunneled its way to the surface and I now know what it is I need in order to make my life complete.
Well, that's wonderful news.
How can I help? You can give me your sperm.
I beg your pardon? -I want to have another baby.
-Well, you certainly don't need me for that.
Surely someone in Boston must have sperm.
I came to you first so that Frederick could have a full sibling.
-So, just like that we're going to have another baby together.
-Not just like that.
I mapped out our dominant and recessive traits on a genome square, applied Mendel's laws, allowed for anomalies and concluded that you are the best biological choice.
I see.
Well, as enticed as I am by your honeyed words, I'm gonna need some kissin'.
Frasier, don't misunderstand, I'm not proposing any change in our relationship.
Would we sleep together? I thought we'd freeze your sperm.
Is that a "yes" or a "no"? Natural fertilization is impractical.
I'd have to fly to Seattle -every time I ovulate.
-Right, okay.
So, then your plan is for me to visit some local doctor, -freeze my essence and then bring it home with you.
-Correct.
I'll take mine "to go".
I don't know.
I'm going to have to think about it.
Yes, of course, absolutely.
Think about it, -and you can give me your answer tomorrow.
-Okay.
You can come back from around the corner now, Martin.
-Good night, Lilith.
-Good night.
-You were eavesdropping? -By accident, and I only heard the part about her wanting to have another baby with you.
-She completely threw me.
-Well, I don't know why you're so surprised.
She's seen what the Crane genes can do and she's coming back to the well.
-How does one respond to something like that? -Well, I bet if you say "No", -she'll go to Niles.
-Really, it's just so self-centered.
I mean, she's got this all figured out for herself without the slightest consideration for my life.
And Niles'll say "No" for sure.
Which means only one thing.
She'll come to the source.
Me.
The fountainhead.
-What? -Can you imagine? Lilith's and my kid would be brother to you and Niles AND Freddie.
What are you talking about? And if you and Lilith got back together, you'd be his step-father and his brother and Niles would be your son and his own uncle.
It's almost worth doing just so that I can tell the story.
-Oh, hi, Niles.
Did Daphne and her mom get off okay? -Yes.
They picked up Roz and Alice an hour ago.
Although, how they're going to get all the way to Canada without killing each other, I don't know.
-Why did they have to go so far? -Well, that was my idea.
I read that Canadian Fun Country is one of the best amusement parks in southeastern British Columbia.
Well, I'm just saying Daphne's mom should be careful, you know.
If you're here on a temporary visa, you know sometimes people have a hard time getting back into the country.
That hadn't occurred to me, Frasier.
Well, seeing as how you're single, I'd invite you to join me for dinner, but I'm meeting with Lilith tonight -on a matter of some delicacy.
-Dad told me.
Now listen, don't feel obligated because she's buying you dinner.
Truth be told, Niles, I hadn't ruled it out entirely.
It would be nice to have another child.
And Lilith is a wonderful mother.
It's just that, well, is it right to create a human being with a woman to whom you couldn't stand being married? Well, I'm behind you whatever decision you make, the right one or the crazy one.
-Thank you.
-Excuse me, may I have an espresso? -What have you got here? -Oh, some snapshots from last summer at the beach.
Daphne finally got them developed.
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