- Mr.
Moon? - You again.
Didn't I toss you out of here last night? Six times.
But if you'll just give me a minute to Gentlemen, this lad has travelled all the way from America to reunite me with my wife.
[ANGRY SHOUTING] NILES: Wait, wait, wait! You never gave me a chance to buy a round of drinks.
[CHEERING] All right.
The usual, Ray.
Starting talking.
You got one pint.
Mr.
Moon, a great man once wrote that the opposite of love is not hate, but indifference.
Done.
Get out.
Mr.
Moon, Mr.
Moon, your wife Your wife is miserable without you.
You should give her another chance.
After all, you were married 40 years.
Forty years too long.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm late for work.
Hello.
Aren't you a pretty thing? Fancy a roll in the hay? Nobody talks to my woman that way.
[GRUNTING] Let's go.
[GROANING] Here's a tenner, Harry.
Hope I didn't hurt you.
All in the line of duty.
Good luck to you.
- She's a nice bit of skirt.
- Ta.
Same again, Ray.
- Ooph.
- What was that? My job.
I let lads give me a thumping to impress their dates.
I tell you, it's a cakewalk compared to being married to Gertrude.
At least when these lads hit me, they hold something back.
Well, you know, Mr.
Moon, you wouldn't recognise your wife.
- She's mellowed.
- You're wasting your breath.
All right, forget about your wife for a minute.
Think about your daughter.
She's heartbroken.
- My Daphne? - Yes! Yes.
This separation is tearing her apart.
If If you care about her, come back to Seattle with me and talk to your wife.
If you don't patch things up, at least your only daughter will know you cared enough to try.
Well, you know, I'd love to see my baby girl again.
But I can't afford to travel across the Atlantic whenever I please.
Oh, I would pay for the ticket, of course.
I can't have you buying me a first-class ticket to America.
- I insist.
- All right.
For Daphne.
You know, you're lucky you caught me on a light workweek.
Oh, here's my 2:00 now.
Hello.
Aren't you a pretty thing? - You mind if I join you, Roz? - Oh, please.
You can help me kill some time.
Roger's picking up his things from my apartment.
- I don't want to run into him.
- Ah, afraid you'll fight? Worse.
I'm afraid we'll end up in bed.
There's something about him that is irresistible.
- I understand.
- Trust me, you don't.
Roger is the best lover I have ever been with.
Oh, my God, what am I saying? You were great, too.
- There's no need to do this.
- It's just that I forgot.
Well, technically, it wasn't really sex because it was you.
But whatever it was, it was great.
Roz, please, there's no need to discuss it.
- I was one satisfied customer.
- Glad to hear it.
Oh, here, let's pretend that this comment card is about you.
Roz, please, there is no need to do that.
Oh, all right, if you insist.
Just remember that it was late at night, and I am really more of a morning person.
There you go.
Let's see.
[ROZ CHUCKLES] High marks for courtesy and neatness of appearance.
- That's good.
- Mm-hm.
You were served in a prompt and timely manner.
Absolutely.
Now, I see here that, um, you're not planning a return visit.
Well, only because we agreed.
I mean, as you can see, I will highly recommend you to friends and family members.
Well, that's very kind of you, Roz.
Thank you.
Would you like me to fill one out for you? No.
I think you made your opinion clear when you screamed, "Outstanding.
" Oh.
Well, thanks for a tour of your city, lads.
- Now where's your loo? - Ah.
I need to splash my boots.
Oh.
Just an expression.
Or so I've chosen to believe.
Niles, are you and Daphne planning on having children? - Someday.
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