Bucket of hot dogs.
Check.
Butt massager engaged.
Check.
Then let the video games begin! Wait.
Hang on.
I lost my controller.
There is no controller.
The X-Cube tracks your motions with a built-in camera.
Oh, yeah? Track this motion! Frykowski, BenderlsGreat34, follow me! Sounds like fun on a bun! You guys, again? Ach, these dorkeschoens! Let's humiliate them with slingshots.
Shoot your weapon, Private! Wait.
How do I Hold on.
Oops.
Sorry to kill und run, but I really must be GÃ ring.
Ah! Man! Pwned again! This is all Bender's fault.
Admit it, your reflexes suck! Aw, it's true.
My circuitry's I can't keep up with today's high-speed, top-of-the-line kids! You can't even keep up with me, and I'm some sort of Stone Age throwback.
You know, I might be able to speed up your reflexes by overclocking you.
Uh, what's that, sonny? You say it'll put some whoopie in my cushion? This might take a while.
I've got to adjust the memory timing, raise the CPU voltage, and delete 12 terabytes of outdated catchphrases.
Sounds like fun on a bun! Deleted.
Fry, can we talk about our relationship? Of course.
Our relationship is the best thing in my life, so I'm sure I'll enjoy talking about it with you.
I don't know.
I guess I'm just feeling uneasy about us being so on-again-off-again.
Maybe it's none of my business, but if it were up to me, we'd be on all the time.
And I mean all the time.
But what would that be like? I mean, if we were together, where would we be 10 years from now? Still here? Definitely.
Or somewhere else.
Maybe I'm having some kind of early-life crisis, but, look, don't you everwonder about the future? Well, sure, but you're always in it.
Also, sometimes terminators.
All right.
You should run a lot faster now.
Unless you die.
Whoo! I'm smart! I know how to spell "aardvark!" February is the shortest month! There's 3,018 jelly beans in that jar! Damn, I'm good! I mean 3,018 rat kidneys.
Now, then, my man, let's see if your reflexes are Faster! Hyah! Get 'em! Get 'em! Get 'em! Hey, foreign aggressors, what's up? We were just eating Spätzle and listening to Kraftwerk I mean fire! That tap-dancing, decadent jazz-baby is too fast for us! Let's see him outrun a V-2! It's my brains against your Von Braun! Ach! I could have fired a V-8! Those guys normally stink.
That's why we play them exclusively.
Those cheaters must have cheated! Now, Larry, let's deal with this like mature adults.
Mommy! What is it, you colicky bastards? We were playing video games, and the other kids didn't play fair.
What? Nobody rips off my kids but me! We can find out who they are through their motion-capture camera.
It better not be those little Korean girls again.
Aha! Got it! Whoo! We're the greatest! Mostly me! Bender Rodriguez? But he's a stock MomCorp bending unit, and he's 12 years out of date.
How could he possibly play that well? Did you see me? History came alive and I killed it! If I overclock you some more, maybe we can beat those Korean girls! Well, well.
That nerd-burglar overclocked the robot's processor! And that voids his warranty.
Even an idiot like me knows that.
An idiot like you knows nothing! Ah! What matters is, it violates the license agreement, and that means I've got him right by his little Ding-dong.
I'm saying "ding-dong" 'cause you don't have a doorbell.
Hey, pigs.
We're looking for a Cubert J.
Farnsworth.
You're porkin' at him.
You're under arrest for felony violation of the MomCorp license agreement.
What's all this oinking about? Who called the fuzz? Sir, who is this boy's legal guardian? You're porkin' at him.
Then the charges apply to you, too.
What? Farnsworth? What a lucky break! After all these years, I've got him! And legally, too! Even an idiot like me knows he'll be ruined.
An idiot like you is correct! Ah! You overclocked Bender? What did I teach you about tinkering with machinery? How.
You taught me how.
I also taught you not to get caught.
Oh, I wish I'd never cloned you.
It's not my fault.
I didn't even know Bender had a license agreement.
Neither did I Oh.
Bender, as my newest employee, could you bend this drinking straw for me? Sure, let me just Whoa.
First click the license agreement, dearie.
I really shouldn't agree to things I don't understand, but I'm slightly thirsty.
Oh, God! I clicked without reading! And I slightly modified a thing that I own! We're monsters! Congratulations, Mother.
Can you die happy now? Not yet.
Darn.
I can't rest until this bending unit is restored to factory specs! Why not? If people learn they can overclock their old robots, they won't buy my new robots! This will not stand! Hoverfish, bring me the clock of Bender Rodriguez.
Good news, everyone! That's what the Professor would say if he weren't in jail facing a life sentence.
Guys! Guys! I discovered I have an extra processor in my compartment of mystery! Being overclocked was a start, but once I activate this processor, I'll be all, like, "You a big dummy, Einstein! Get a haircut!" Oh, wow! I can't believe how stupid I used to be and you still are! What are all these pagey things? Look out! You're overheating! Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, now I'm water-cooled.
I can stimulate my intellect without further thermodynamical disruption.
I miss the old, illiterate Bender.
What's happened to you, mon? I thought you liked beer and knock-knock jokes.
I'm processing so fast, it's like I can anticipate that the ceiling fan's gonna fall and knock Zoidberg unconscious.
Wrong, Mr.
Genius.
Not that ceiling fan.
In fact, looking ahead, it's obvious Mom won't allow me to stay accelerated like this.
Hmm.
Who's up for a turkey dinner and a game of badminton? Say what? Uh-oh.
He must be overheating again.
Bending unit, you are ordered to report for factory reset.
Okay, sure.
But first, this.
I hear turkey.
Oh, boy.
Hey, hey, hey! Ten more processors for me.
Once I install these, I'll have access to the loftiest realms of thought.
Anyone have access to a lofty realm of gravy? I can conceive of gravies that would boggle your tiny mind! But it's not safe here, so I'll need to find a hideout.
Hideout? Bender, are you becoming some kind of supervillain? Farewell, monobrains.
Your Honor, Mom is a poor, frail industrialist with three special sons who require constant neglect.
Yet isn't it true, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, that this boy, this Cubert Farnsworth That's my name.
Don't wear it out.
deliberately robbed her blind by improving his own robot? It's true! He did it! No further questions for this jury.
Before I call a recess for mimosas and horse breeding, can the defense produce the bending unit in question? We don't know where the hell he is.
Your Honor, that is something we cannot a-doodle-doo.
Then I'm holding the defendants in contempt and fining them $10,000 a day until they produce the robot.
At that rate, Planet Express will be bankrupt in four fingers! It's been a good run, people, but this Is the end.
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