5. Coal Digger (第1季)【完整台词】

Let's go, buddy.

School time.

Gloria, if you want to get together with the girls later, I could just watch the football game or something.

- That means he wants to watch the game.

- I'm not talking to you.

And what are you drinking coffee for, anyway? It's my culture.

I'm Colombian.

What part of Colombia are those French toaster sticks from? I'm not sure about the game.

The whole family is coming over for the barbecue.

- It's today? - Sí.

- It's the Ohio State game.

- So, everybody can watch.

I dislike watching the game with people who don't know the game.

People talk.

- You talk at my football games.

- For one thing, it's called soccer.

Your team's scored two goals all season.

I'm not taking a big risk.

- How much of this did you drink? - Give me a break.

I have to climb a rope today.

Hey, mom? Can I have $40 for lunch? $40? - I also need a book for school.

- What book? I want a dress.

Do you have any idea what a bad liar you are? I'd be more worried that she couldn't come up with a single book title.

Luke, come on, we're late! There's a first Inside out and backwards.

At least it isn't zipped into his There it is.

There's book smart, and then there's street smart.

Yeah, and then there's Luke.

He's just curious, that's all.

He's got this almost scientific mind with a thirst for knowledge.

He's like this little Einstein.

Some people ask "why?" Luke asks, "why not?" I ask "why" a lot.

We're at the 10 We're at the 5 We're at the 1 Daddy, we're scoring a touchdown! Please don't spike our baby.

- Why does she look like the Hamburglar? - She's a referee.

Do we even have to go to my dad's tonight? Are you kidding me? We're playing Ohio State.

I collect antique fountain pens, I'm adept at Japanese flower arrangement Ikebana.

And I was a starting offensive lineman at the University of Illinois.

Surprise! I don't like football.

Being in a relationship is pretending to enjoy your partner's interests.

Do you think I really loved home pickle making? - Yeah, 'cause you did.

- For a week, until we became the weird guys who gave everybody pickles.

"Thank you, Marvin, for inviting us into your lovely home.

- "Care for a sack of pickles?" - It was charming.

We were picklers.

You know what? Fine.

Stay home with your little jagged scissors, maybe catch up on your scrapbooking.

You loved scrapbooking! Did I, Mitchell? Did I? Don't do the "double question to prove a point" thing.

I hate it.

Do you, Mitchell? Do you? No problem.

We'll be right down.

Thanks.

Hey, honey.

What's up? The school just called.

Luke got in a fight.

Oh, geez.

Is he okay? Yeah, he's fine, but they want us to come down there.

- Where are you? - I'm showing a house.

What house? I'm golfing.

- I bet it was that Durkas kid.

- I hate that kid.

He probably jumped on Luke, and Luke just fought back.

- Kid's a menace.

- He made fun of my hair once.

Shh, the parents are probably in there.

I slept on it funny Like that never happened to him.

Come on.

- What are you doing here? - These two knuckleheads were fighting.

- What?! - Could have been worse.

I was not ready to face Durkas today.

So, what happened? Apparently, there was some name-calling and shoving on the playground.

By the time a teacher separated them, Luke was sitting on Manny's chest.

- Luke, that's not like you.

- Wait a minute.

You're Luke's father? - Grandfather.

- So Manny's father is Javier.

Crazy guy.

That's where he gets his fire.

- Okay, you're - He's our son.

- And my grandson.

- I'm his daughter.

- So, you're - His uncle.

Stop saying that, or I'll sit on your chest again! Wait a second.

Is that what this was all about? - He keeps calling me his nephew.

- You are! Shut up! I'm getting the sense that you're all related somehow.

It's best if you work this out at home so the boys can go back to class, okay? But we're not happy about this, boys.

This is not how mature young men behave.

Here's your note for Miss Passwater.

I wouldn't worry.

They're good kids.

It's just tough when one kid's a little different.

You heard how she said that, right? She thought Luke was the weird one.

Her kid gets his head stuck in the furniture, and Manny is the different one.

Our son is not weird.

What's weird is that her kid wears aftershave and dresses like a count.

We should cancel with them for the barbecue.

If we cancel, it'll just make this a bigger deal than it is.

It'll be good for Luke and Manny to spend some time.

- Might be good for you and Gloria, too.

- Why? She's always had a problem with me.

- I think I'm gonna find out what it is.

- That's the worst thing you could do.