23. Tableau Vivant (第3季)【完整台词】

Phil, honey, you're still up.

Okay, how does this sound? Mitchell, I love you very much, I not only love you, but admire you, - and someday I hope to - Are you firing him or proposing to him? Honey, this was supposed to be a part-time job.

He was gonna be done in the summer anyway.

- Just be direct.

- I should have warned him.

How do you tell someone they have a reputation for being lazy? Mitchell? Lazy? Yeah.

Yeah.

He handed in a couple of contracts late, but I didn't want to say anything because he's practically doing this for free.

I can't do this! This isn't the face of a cold-blooded hatchet man.

Will you do it? Hey.

Oh, I'm sorry.

Did we wake you up? No, I was up.

I'm worried about tomorrow.

My art teacher acts like I don't exist, but I have one last chance to impress him at our year-end art fair.

A few students are doing living versions of famous paintings.

I've chosen this one, and I'm using my own family.

Brilliant, right? When I told him, he said, "that's nice, Alice.

" It's been a year.

Alice? Really? Honey, do you think you're nervous because you've got a little crush on Mr.

Jarvis? - No.

- Are you sure? Because I've seen the way you look at him-- Sounds like you're the one with the crush! I've just never had a teacher not like me before.

- Well, Ms.

Davis.

- Mm.

Please.

She's a gym teacher.

She is to teaching what Dr.

Seuss is to medicine.

And to think she didn't like you.

You? What's your problem? Nothing.

I'm just excited for tomorrow.

I'm getting a medal at school because I put out a fire.

Luke, what happened? I don't know.

I was just walking by and I smelled flames.

I was there.

I don't like this.

We're not supposed to be in here.

Just keep a lookout! We're ten seconds away from creating luketonium.

- Oh, crap! - Look what you did! Luke, what happened? I don't know.

I was just walking by and I smelled flames.

Okay, guys, you're gonna be dragging tomorrow if you don't go to bed right now.

Let's go.

Go.

Fine.

Come on, Alice.

I'll be up in a minute.

"Mitchell, "I can't tell you how hard How hard this" No, that's-- no, it's not personal enough.

Okay, okay.

"I can't tell you how hurt and angry this makes me, "but you've been late too many times.

I'll need your keys.

" Daddy, no! I'm so sorry! Honey, I didn't hear you come downstairs.

You couldn't sleep, either? Uh, yeah.

No, there's just, like, a lot on my mind with graduation, and what to wear.

How does this look? Wait a second.

You're carrying your shoes.

How am I supposed to judge the whole outfit? Put 'em on.

So make sure you give this menu here a good, thorough reading.

- Soup.

- You didn't even look at it.

- Soup.

- Check out what's below the soup-- Sandwiches.

Have you check out what is below this outfit? This doesn't come from sandwiches.

Look! "The Jay Pritchett"? I don't understand.

They named you after a sandwich? No! They named a sandwich after me! "Turkey, bacon, Swiss cheese, red peppers, anchovies on wheat"? Most people would stop after the salty bacon, but I double down with the anchovies.

Were you making a sandwich or attracting deer? Is this bum bothering you, miss? Oh, I should get a picture of this-- an actual waitress sighting in this dump.

I took a chance and put in an order for your sandwich, although most people like their Jay Pritchetts to go.

What's happening? Gloria, it's Maxine.

So you're married to Jay.

Where'd you tie up your seeing eye dog? No, no, I'm not, um Okay, I get it.

I get it.

Here's that number for that neck doctor I want you to see.

- Thanks.

- What's wrong with your neck? For 30 years, I've been hearing it's a handball injury.

But it always seems to get worse with stress.

Maybe it's that audit he's got coming up.

- Audit? - It's nothing.

Oh, isn't that cute? He doesn't want you to worry.

Here's your sandwich.

Now you should worry.

Look at it-- my prettiest child.

Why didn't you tell me about your neck? It's fine.

Take a bite.

- Your company's getting audited? - Nothing! Three bad days, then it's over.

Come on! I'm-- I'm anxious to hear what you think.

I see it growing on ya.

It's like Maxine when she first tried it.

- You know, she-- - I don't like it.

- You probably didn't get all-- - Jay, I try it.

I don't like it.

That's all you can say? It tastes bad in my mouth.

It's like a fish and a turkey beat themselves to death with a pepper.

Okay, fair enough.

Maybe a little picky, though, from someone who prepared a Colombian specialty and said, "why are you not eating the hooves? They're the best part.

" I'm back! Oh, hey, Uncle Cam.

Oh, thanks again for picking me up last night.

You're welcome, but you have to be more careful.

I was the responsible one.

Lisa was drinking, and I took her keys, - and then e-- - I understand.

My senior year, I had a pretty crazy night myself involving a bottle of corn mash and an overturned plow.

- Seriously? - Yeah.