13. Rash Decisions (第6季)【完整台词】

We're back! Funniest thing-- Stella fell in love with this dog on our walk, just stared at it lovingly.

Turned out to be her reflection in a hubcap.

Can you blame her? I got an "A" on my history exam, by the way.

Really, you're competing with the dog? Don't let it bother you, girl.

Jay, we need to talk.

I went to an allergist today, and he thinks that Joe's rash is an allergy.

What a surprise-- an allergist found an allergy.

He thinks he might be allergic to Stella.

What? The only reaction this dog gives people is the giggles.

I mean, when she tried to lick her own face In my village, if a goat acted that dumb, we wouldn't even eat it.

This allergy thing is very serious.

We need to separate them for a week to see if the rash goes away.

I don't know if I can go that long without seeing Joe.

Not Joe! The dog! I already called Mitch and Cameron.

They're gonna take her.

For a week?! She'll be traumatized! She's very sensitive! She scrapes her butt on the driveway.

Why don't you like her? She's never done anything to you.

Ay, look! My face cream! Do you know how much this costs? No.

How much? Don't change the subject! The dog goes now! You know, now that I think about it, I could be allergic to Stella.

I've been a little stuffy since we got her.

You were stuffy long before Stella.

Do you not remember scolding that waiter at Chuck E.

Cheese for serving you from the right? Victorian.

Modern.

Craftsman.

Spanish.

European Gothic? Andy, it's the castle from "Frozen.

" I'm sorry, but you're not ready.

What? To hear that you're ready! Congratulations, assistant! I'm moving you up to the next level.

Holy cow.

That was an emotional thrill ride.

This Sunday, you are manning the open house of the Cape Cod on Linden.

That means you're gonna be sticking the sign and the balloons on the corner, you're gonna be turning on all the lights, you're gonna be baking all the brownies.

I will make you proud, sir.

What else are you gonna do? I will make sure people sign in.

What else? When I show someone the master bedroom, I'll say, "This is where the magic happens.

" - I'm sold! - Yes! Hey, buddy.

I got to hit the mall a little later.

You wanna grab a couple of chair massages till they kick us out? Nah.

I'm gonna go hang out with some of my friends.

Okay.

Have fun.

Teenagers, huh? Yeah, it's been happening more and more, but it's natural.

Kids that age want distance.

One day, they're holding your hand so tight it hurts.

The next day, they're eating the apple you kind of wanted.

Not me.

I never turned down an offer to hang with my dad.

Luckily for him, he died before my rebellious teenage years.

That must be grandpa with Stella.

Remember, Lily, she's only gonna be here for a week, she's not gonna be our permanent pet.

Don't tell me, tell Larry.

He's been acting jealous all day.

You're being crazy! - Hey, dad.

- Hey, Jay.

There's our precious little houseguest.

Okay, guys, listen up.

She gets three walks a day.

Keep her off the bed.

We're training her.

No chicken bones.

If she starts to wheeze-- Wow.

Remember when you dropped me off at summer camp? You barely slowed down the car.

You never had a condition that made it difficult to breathe.

I was a closeted gay kid at sports camp.

I spent the week in mid-faint.

Lily, don't forget to give Stella lots of belly rubs.

Grandpa, this is coming at a really bad time for me and Larry.

Okay, well, now, don't you worry about Wily not woving you yet.

Aw, who's the little weeble wobble? - I can't watch this.

- Okay.

Bye, dad.

Oh, I don't know.

I guess in my free time, I like to keep up with the latest discoveries in renewable energy.

Just think, a few more months and you'll never have to deal with this again.

You know, I don't mind college interviews.

I actually like discussing the things that they-- I was talking to the mirror.

I know all you had to do to get in your college was like their Facebook page, but this is Princeton.

I have to show them that I'm a serious thinker, and you could be a bit more supportive.

You're right.

I'm sorry.

Your outfit's perfect.

Thanks.

If you're applying to Lumberjack School.

And majoring in having your cats eat you when you die.

Well, hello.

How was your first day back in the closet Business? That doesn't make any sense.

I've never worked here before.

It's just a gay joke, Mitchell.

Don't overthink it.

You settling in? Yeah.

Yeah.

I mean, you know, I'm in jeans and I'm at work-- I feel like a mechanic.

I am looking forward to doing a few days of freelance legal work for my dad because, uh, where I work, I've gotten the unfair reputation of being the office nag, which is See, it's only because I work with a bunch of slobs.

I mean, I must tell these people "Wipe down the microwave," "Clean the coffee pot," "Whose moldy lunch meat is this, Kevin?" So, did they put up much of a fight when you asked for that time off, or? Yeah, it's so nice and casual here.

I can't wait to get my chill on.

What are you doing? Hm? What? This is me.

No, it's not.

For the next few days it is.

When I leave here, men will want to be me, women will want to shop with me.