Previously on "Desperate Housewives" Well, if Libby here likes us as much as we like her, we should just go ahead and move to adopt her baby girl.
- Who's the father? - Honestly, I don't know.
Carlos and Gaby made a deal.
I did remarry my ex, but it was only because - he has great health insurance.
- Susan made amends.
You know, I never thought I'd have such a good time hanging out with my girlfriend and her husband.
- And Mike - Didn't she mention we dated? - made a confession - Liar! You've just been leading me on! You're obviously still in love with this guy! - of his own.
On her first day of sobriety, Bree Van De Kamp found an old cork, which reminded her just how much she craved Chablis.
So she called her sponsor, who came over with a DVD which they watched till her craving had passed.
Five days later, after she developed a thirst for Merlot, Peter arrived with a deck of cards.
The next week, he brought over Chinese takeout because Bree had told him she was consumed by thoughts of vintage Chardonnay.
By her 20th day of sobriety, Bree had stopped thinking about alcohol altogether because her thoughts were now centered elsewhere.
Hmm I'm curious, Peter.
What is the easiest way to overcome addiction? Oh, some folks try shock therapy.
Other use, uh, hypnosis.
But taking it one day at a time still makes the most sense to me.
Why? I don't know.
I guess I'm just impatient to get on with my life.
What are you doing? I was just giving you a little kiss.
Why? Well, it's just my way of saying thank you for everything you've done for me over the past few weeks.
What's wrong? This is gonna seem like it's coming out of left field, but in addition to being a recovering alcoholic, I'm also a member of S.
A.
Sex addicts anonymous.
Oh.
And that's a-a real thing? Yes.
And sex is as much an addiction for me as booze.
That's why when you turn me on like that, - it's a bit of a problem.
- It was just a peck on the cheek.
It doesn't matter.
The slightest touch gets my juices flowing.
- So, how long has it been since you - A year.
They have this rule plant, pet, person.
If I can keep a plant alive, you know, then I can move on to a pet.
And if I can make that work, then I can start dating again.
So how are you doing? - I'm on my fourth ficus.
- Oh.
See? I think you can handle affection better than you give yourself credit for.
I'm sorry.
Um I think I should go.
- Really? - Yeah.
But but you forgot your shirt! Keep it.
Though she didn't know it, Bree had answered her own question.
The easiest way to overcome one addiction is to replace it with another.
Everybody Says Don't Temptation it's the name of a well-known establishment on the outskirts of Fairview.
Its clientele is devoted.
Everyone who goes there wants to get their hands on something.
And when they cross a line Hey! I warned you, pal.
they are punished as a certain married couple was about to discover.
Hi.
You want a lap dance? Uh No, thanks.
No.
I sure hope Libby likes this camera.
Well, why wouldn't she? It's exactly what she asked for, the most expensive one in the store.
You know, I'm telling you, Carlos, I'm getting really tired of kissing her ass.
The woman is giving us her baby.
We'll kiss whatever needs kissing.
What the hell are you guys doing here? Uh, we brought you this gift, and you said that you didn't want us coming by your house Thanks, but I'm working, so you gotta go.
Look, we spent a lot of money on that.
The least you can do is open it so we can bask in your happy expression.
Is there a problem here? No, we're just talking.
Everything's fine.
Carlos Solis.
This is my wife, Gabrielle.
We're friends of Libby's.
Oh, hey, I'm Frank, Libby's boyfriend.
Libby, you didn't tell us you had a boyfriend.
Didn't I? I thought I had.
What's that, a present for our baby? I'm sorry, did you just say "our" baby? Yeah.
It's our first.
Hey! What's for lunch? Omelettes.
You want me to make you one? No, thank you.
I'll just pick at yours.
I didn't know you still had a key, Dad.
Of course I do.
I have to watch out for my two favorite ladies.
Try the cheese.
That's the best part.
You mean, two of your three favorite ladies.
You know, when you add in Edie.
Right! Of course.
And speaking of Edie, I have some big news.
I finally did it.
I popped the question.
Oh! Congratulations, Dad! Yeah congratulations.
Um, what happened to waiting six months? Edie and I aren't getting married tomorrow.
It takes months to plan a classy wedding, you know? Remember ours, hmm? You had to have it outdoors, huh? Ugh.
It poured.
I could have murdered that weatherman.
We were all crammed under this little gazebo thing.
It was hysterical.
I thought the whole wedding day was ruined.
I loved it! It felt spontaneous.
All our friends gathered close around us, hmm? Remember? You said it was the happiest day of your life.
Just like you marrying Edie will be the happiest day of her life.
Yeah.
Right.
Her, too.
Toodles.
Oh, hi.
Hello.
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