Five years ago, Susan Delfino Gave birth to a son in delivery room "A" Of Fairview memorial hospital.
Moments later, Lila dash gave birth to a daughter in delivery room "B.
" Around 10:00 the next morning, As the two new mothers Were leaving the hospital, They nearly Ran into each other.
Of course, They never knew this.
In fact, Susan and Lila would have been Surprised to know How often their paths Would cross over the years.
They almost met At the local coffee shop and another time at Their veterinarian's office and again in the bleachers Of the Fairview flyers.
But despite These close calls, Susan and Lila never met until one tuesday, When Susan decided To take her husband To a fancy restaurant For their anniversary at the same time, Lila decided To take her daughter To buy some ice cream.
That was the night That Susan Delfino And Lila Dash Finally ran into each other.
Mike! It will happen to all of us Eventually.
The moment will come When we ask ourselves where did the time go? How did the children I once cradled grow up so very quickly? How did the life I dreamt of turn into a career I never expected? And how did that woman I saw each day in the mirror become someone I don't even recognize? Juanita, this dress Is awfully tight.
- I don't think You can get into it.
- No, it's pretty.
I can do it.
How's that one fit? I think we're gonna need The next size up.
There is no Next size up.
They don't make princess dresses For girls over 7.
She's only 4 1/2.
Look, my daughter was invited To a princess party, So I can't let her Be the only girl there without a princess dress.
Did you try The costume section? I bet they'd have a Mrs.
Shrek Dress that would fit her.
Juanita, take off the dress! We're going.
No! I candoit.
Look, I feel for you.
My niece also has A weight problem.
My daughter does not have A weight problem.
She has a little baby fat, That's all.
In fact, The only problem she has Is this store Being completely unprepared For a perfectly average 4-Year-Old girl.
Just ring it up.
No! For God sakes.
What's wrong now? Once again, The concept is, sweetie, You're taking the pie Out of the oven, Your face aglow With surprise.
Why am I surprised? Because it turned out So perfectly.
That's no surprise.
My pies are always perfect.
All right.
It's your best pie ever.
You've topped yourself.
And I know this Before I've tasted it? Sweetie, just make Whatever face you want.
I just think You'll sell more cookbooks If you don't look like You just made love To an ice cube.
Andrew, dear, I'm going to Take a little break.
Would you pleaseTell this gentleman That if he calls me "sweetie" One more time, I'm gonna grab his camera And take a picture of his colon? You got that, right? Katherine, hi.
What are you doing here? The waiters need to be paid, And you took the key To the cashbox again.
Sorry.
Paid for what? The armenian wedding? Lunch for 300? It was right after the breakfast For the garden club, Which you also missed.
I'm sorry.
I didn't know a photo shoot Would take this long.
Who knew it'd be this Hard to pose for a book cover? You'll be fine.
If there's one thing You're really good at, It's posing as a chef.
Okay, Katherine.
I know this book has been Monopolizing my time, And you feel overworked And undervalued.
But I do appreciate you.
In fact, I have a gift for you.
It's the galleys Of my new book.
Read page 2.
"For Katherine Mayfair" "A wonderful cook" "And an even better friend.
" You dedicated it to me? You make this All possible.
It's the least I could do.
Excuse me.
Time is money.
Chop-Chop, sweetie.
Do we have a backup pie? Yes.
Yes, we do.
Good.
And the big blind catches a jack On the river.
- Preston? - Mom! What the hell's Going on here? Don't freak out.
We're just playing cards.
Why didn't you Play at home? Why did you Have to sneak in here? Tequila shots! 5 bucks! Asked and answered.
Okay, that's it! Everybody out.
Game's over.
Can I have your chair For a second? Look up here! Mom's here.
Party's over.
Door's open.
Out you go.
Go on.
Shoo! You guys have pulled A lot of stupid stunts.
But this? This? Risking our liquor license, Our livelihood? Who's going to find out? I mean, we've been running this Game for a month, and nobody Unbelievable.
You guys Are grounded for two weeks.
- But we have mecoming.
- Keep complaining.
I'd love to make it a year.
Now clean this place up.
Now! That was fantastic.
Amazing.
- You were incredible.
- So were you.
Oh.
And Time to go.
So it's been, what, Four months? Are you ever gonna Let me spend the night? I don't know.
Come on, zippy, zippy.
It's just, you know Girls usually beg me To spend the night.
Good, then you shouldn't Have any problem finding a place to sleep.
Fine.
I know the drill.
I can't spend the night.
I can't meet your friends.
I can't meet your son.
I'm just wondering Is this ever gonna Turn into something normal? You know, you're a guy, And we just had hot sex, And I didn't force you To cuddle.
So run! Go! Brag to your friends.
Look I like you, And I know you like me.
So why can't we be a couple? 'Cause I'm not ready For that.
And what we've got That's all I can handle.
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