- What I drink last night.
- All right. Never mind. I'll find it.
What do you mean
you'll find it?
Look, I don't give a damn
who finds it.
All right.
It's time for action.
You will go upstairs and occupy
chair number one...
and I will lead the attack
at the Bureau of Housing.
- I'm off.
- Uh, wait.
- I'm off.
- Uh, wait.
What shall I tell them?
You will tell them that you are
Cousin Michael from Kiev...
and you will say that
all the Vorobyaninovs are dead...
and that you are willing to pay
hard rubles for something...
to remember them by.
[Sighs]
Cousin Michael from Kiev.
All the Vorobyaninovs are dead.
I am Cousin Michael from Kiev.
All the Vorobyaninovs are dead.
- Yes?
- I am Cousin Kiev from Vorobyaninov.
- All the Michaels are dead.
- What?
What can I do for you?
I am Cousin... Chair!
[Audio Sped Up, High-pitched]
Aaah! Give me that... I want that chair!
- Stop or I'll call the police!
- Police?
- Give it to me! Give it to me!
- No! No! No! No!
Aaah!
[Groaning]
[Both Yelling, High-pitched]
[Yelling Continues]
Father Fyodor.
[Panting]
How are ya?
[Chuckles Nervously]
Well, this is disgusting.
This is truly disgusting.
Not so fast! Not so fast!
- That's my chair.
- Ah.
It's the Holy Father.
Taking up a collection, are you?
- Here's a donation.
- [Groans]
Thank you.
[Both Yelling, High-pitched]
- [Groans]
- [Groans]
- Why are you after my chair?
- It's not yours.
- Then whose is it?
- It's nationalized property.
- It belongs to the workers.
- Did you say the workers?
- Yes. The workers.
- Maybe the Holy Father...
is a member
of the Communist Party.
- Maybe.
- But the party is for atheists.
How can a priest
join the party?
- [Blow Lands]
- [Groans]
The church must keep up
with the times.
[Grunts]
How did you find out
about the jewels?
People talk.
Why, you disgusting creature.
You used the sacred sacrament
of confession...
to further your own ends.!
- Not really.
- Well, you are just about...
the most
contemptible creature...
it has ever been
my misfortune to meet.
You're not worth
spitting on!
- Well, you are!
- [Groans]
Come back, you coward.!
You'd better keep away
from my chairs.!
Finders, keepers!
Hmm. It's just like
a detective story.
We have a mysterious rival.
Hey, uh, you'd better
get out of here.
You look rather conspicuous.
You're right.
You're right.
Oh, how I hate him.
Oh, God, how I hate him.
Go.
[Chattering]
[Chorus Vocalizing]
[Mumbling]
"Hambs."
"Drapes."
[Mumbling]
Here we are.
[Grunts]
[Groans]
Hello.
Ah.
Oh.
[Mumbling]
That's it.
[Stammering]
[Laughing]
- Can I help you?
- [Screams]
- Well?
- [Whimpering]
[Sobbing]
I didn't know
anybody was... here.
I came in and...
l...
Persons seeking information are to wait
in the waiting area prescribed for them.
It is a criminal offense
for unauthorized citizens...
to tamper with official files.
Oh, yes. Yes, to be sure.
To be sure.
- Remove your hat.
- Oh.
All right. Now that you are in the proper area,
would you please state your business?
Chairs. Dining room...
walnut, made by Hambs...
belonging to a certain
lppolit Matveyevich Vorobyaninov.
- Tell me, comrade.
- Yes.
Why exactly are you seeking
this particular set of chairs?
It's, uh...
It's personal.
I'm sorry.
No information.
No information.
All right. All right.
I'll tell you everything.
I am Vorobyaninov's son.
His firstborn.
He was like a father to me.
So...
you are Vorobyaninov's son.
Yes, I am.
- How old are you?
- Forty-six. Forty-four.
- Which is it?
- Forty-two. I'm 42.
- According to our records, Vorobyaninov is 53.
- [Whimpers]
That means that when you were born,
your father was...
[Whistles]
Ah.
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《十二把椅子》是个极其有趣的讽刺故事。它通过一个贵族出身的小公务员和一个流氓找寻十二把藏有财富的椅子的曲折离奇经历,尖锐地讽刺了许多卑污可笑的现象。
导演: 梅尔·布鲁克斯
编剧: 梅尔·布鲁克斯
主演: 朗·穆迪 / 弗兰克·兰格拉 / 多姆·德路易斯
类型: 喜剧 / 冒险
制片国家/地区: 美国
语言: 英语 / 俄语
上映日期: 1970-10-28
片长: 94 分钟
12把椅子 The Twelve Chairs(1970) 全部台词 (当前第4页,一共 11 页)
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