This programme contains strong
language and adult humour.
I opened a cafe with my friend, Boo.
Yeah, she's dead now.
Thank you for coming in today.
That kind of thing won't get
you very far here any more.
Oh! Argh!
I suppose you should meet Hillary.
She's beautiful!
Mum died three years ago.
Loo, doo, ooh, badoo!
All right, Dad?
Dad's way of coping with two
motherless daughters was to buy us
tickets to feminist lectures,
start fucking our godmother,
and eventually stop calling.
Did you take the sculpture?
What sculpture?
Martin's being lovely.
I am not drunk.
Always drunk.
Jake's her step-son.
He's really
weird, probably clinically,
but no-one really talks about that.
No.
I got the Finland promotion.
That's amazing! Thank you.
People make mistakes.
Your husband tried to kiss
me on your birthday.
I'm just going to say this once.
He didn't try to kiss you.
He says it was more like the other
way around.
Believe me!/f
How can I believe you?
Because I'm your sister!
After what you did to Boo?
I'm sorry.
I think you should go.
Can I do anything?
No, thank you.
They've gone.
So
Thank you.
This is a love story.
You know when you've done
everything? When you've been all
Squat! Squat! Squat! Squat!/font
.
.
and
You've even
Do you want to have sex?
No!
Can I at least go down on you? No!
You've done everything,
and you feel great.
You're not even thinking about
You don't even think about
And even though your sister
still hates you Thank you.
/fo
.
.
you're pretending to be friends
because your dad is
I'm joking, he's just there
Here's to love.
.
.
and engaged.
To love!
Love.
Hey!
Urgh.
Congratulations, you assholes!
So, it means a great
deal to both of us
that you, that we,
the family, are
.
.
are all
.
.
together here for a very special
family, er
.
.
gang-bang, um
It's just, you know, being here
.
.
you know, I know we've had our
Cos I
I have the feeling, um
.
.
in here
So I just want to say
.
.
very much.
And that's it.
Oh, darling!
Congratulations, Dad.
Congratulations! Cheers.
May these be the worst of our days.
Don't know who this guy is.
Happy for you, old boy.
Best decision a man can make.
Urgh.
You look well.
Thank you.
Right.
Wine, everyone?
I'd love some wine.
Oh, you'll adore it.
I chose it.
Not for us, thanks.
Off the sauce!
Six months and counting.
Why would you do that? We just
Don't want to miss a thing.
.
.
enjoy each other more
I haven't seen her since
Except for
Nice jumpsuit.
Thank you.
You look well, where've you been?
Boots.
It's lovely there this time of year.
Oh, you look fantastic.
Oh, well, you both look gorgeous!
Oh, thank you.
Is that fur?
Yes, but it's OK
because it had a stroke.
Oh, lovely!
I can't go to hell for
that, can I, Father?
No.
Not as long as you confess.
Oh, God, he's their priest.
Then you've nothing to fucking worry
about! Their cool, swea
Love the Catholics! You can get away
with anything.
A lot of
It's an honour to be marrying
you two.
Thank you.
I didn't realise you were allowed
out without your little doggy thing.
Oh, sorry, have I disappointed you?
Of course not.
Devastated.
Can I get you another bottle?
Needy waitress.
Ah, no, it's all
right.
We've already order
Oh, no, really?
I'll have another tequila.
I'll have a tequila.
Great, thank you so much.
Can I get a glass of sparkling water
with a dash of lime, please?
Oh, yes, I'll have the same.
Dream team.
You know the most fascinating
thing about Father here,
is that his mother was
originally a lesbi!
You do look tired.
Oh, it's not as exhausting as I
thought it would be, actually.
She's commuting from Finland.
She has narrowed down her packing
to a ten-minute turnaround.
It's Fabulous! It's all about
Rolling it up, rather than
Folding it.
I read about that.
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