Oh, my God! Fire, fire! Eddie, where are you, boy? - Dad, wake up! Are you in there? - Here, Eddie! Dad, where are you? - Have you seen Eddie? - No! Where is the fire? It's all right! False alarm! The one over my bed went off.
- Thank God.
- And Eddie's back in my room.
The noise it makes! It would be less upsetting to wake up on fire.
- What triggered it? - Who knows? I was dozing when it started screaming away for no reason.
I see.
What have we here? Eddie, you've been smoking in Daphne's room! Bad dog! I know you have a no-smoking rule.
I'm sorry.
Every now and again, I feel a bit tense and I find a ciggy can be soothing.
Real soothing! It should be an hour until my heart stops fibrillating.
It figures.
3:00 am, on the night before I have an early meeting.
Aren't you going back to bed? No.
I'll just sit up for a bit.
- I'm feeling a bit blue.
- Anything you'd like to talk about? No.
You need your sleep.
It's nothing important.
Just that my life's a gaping sinkhole and I'm marking time while the flower of my youth rots on the vine.
Well, so long as you're sure.
I really wish you'd tell me about it.
- If you must know, it's my love life.
- Really? Have you been seeing a man? Only when I close my eyes and concentrate.
- Going through a bit of a drought? - Small wonder.
The rare times I do go out, it's with your father.
People assume I'm his daughter or his girlfriend.
Either way, it's like having a personal can of stud repellent.
I know how bleak these times can be, but they end sooner or later.
I remember a time when I was going through the same.
Just a week later, I met a lovely barmaid.
Sophisticated, if a bit loquacious.
We fell madly in love.
We got engaged.
She left me standing at the altar but the point is, I didn't give up.
I took my poor, battered heart and offered it to Lilith.
Put it in her food processor and hit the purée button.
I rebounded, and look how far I've come.
I'm divorced, lonely living with my father.
You missed your meeting with the new station manager.
Oh, no! I completely forgot.
You look like you've been ridden hard and put away wet.
I was up with Daphne, competing to see whose love life was more pathetic.
On the bright side, I won.
I know what your problems are.
What are hers? She's just having trouble finding men.
- Say no more.
- No, Roz, please.
You do not have to donate one of your boyfriends.
- I'd be happy to.
- One hates to break up a collection.
Triple espresso and my mocha latte.
- Does that chocolate look different? - No.
I think they've switched to an inferior domestic brand.
Waxy.
- Sven Bachman, an aerobics coach.
- No.
This one's perfect.
Günther Dietrich.
He's loads of fun and he's a model.
A German narcissist.
Appealing combination.
- OK.
I'll keep looking.
- For what? A man for Daphne.
- What? - Here we go.
He's a tennis instructor called Brick.
Dear God, Frasier! Sven, Günther, Brick? Why not just soak Daphne in baby oil and hurl her over the prison wall? I've dated all these guys.
Where do you think I came up with the imagery? Listen, you little titmouse Niles, you are out of line here.
And, Roz, he does have a point.
You and Daphne are different.
Daphne is very shy and inexperienced.
You are You'd be hard-pressed to find anyone who's more No one I've dated is good enough for her.
Is that what you're trying to say? No.
That's what I'm trying not to say.
- I'm out of here.
- Wait! No, I can't stay! The fleet is in! And this concludes our test of the emergency broadcast system.
In a real emergency, your radio would be melting in your hands.
We'll be right back after these messages.
In future, please keep your half-eaten food off my console.
- In fact, stay out of my sight.
- You're still mad.
I can tell.
There's that sensitivity that keeps you in such demand with the ladies.
Roz, I'm sorry if I insulted you, but I feel very protective about Daphne.
The man I'm looking for has to be good-looking, smart - Excuse me.
- Yes? - I'm Tom Duran, the new manager.
- Pleasure to meet you.
Sorry about the meeting.
I slept through it.
Yeah, me too, and I was there.
Say, that's a beautiful tie.
I got this in London at one of those custom shops off Sloane Square.
I just came from London.
Five years with the BBC.
Really? I love London.
The museums, the theatre.
Yeah.
I'm a big theatre buff.
I hated leaving.
- Why did you? - I just went through a messy break-up.
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