Less Than Hero - Your call is being - Connected.
By SewerCom.
Reach out and touch the sewers.
Look, Morris! It's Leela calling! Hi, Mom! Hi, Dad! Ready for your big trip to the surface? We're excited, honey, but we don't want to embarrass you.
I mean, your mother and I are basically monsters.
Dad, relax.
You are being so mutant.
I found this adorable little bag to wear over my head.
And it was on sale! No one's wearing anything adorable over their head.
Now listen.
I could never, ever be ashamed of my parents.
I'll see you this weekend.
Hey, guess who I just got off the video phone with.
- No! - My parents! They're coming up from the sewers for a visit Sunday.
Are you off your rocket? Your parents are mutants.
It's illegaI for them to come above ground because they're inferior genetic scum.
Present company excluded, of course.
I'm getting them a speciaI one-day surface permit from city hall.
While you're there, could you get me a license to kill? Sure.
Bare hands or weapon? What does piano wire count as? Good news, anyone.
The Swedish robot from Pi-kea is here with the super-collider I ordered.
Enjoy your affordable Swedish crap.
Let's see what tools we'll need.
Uh-huh.
Uh-huh.
Uh-huh.
All right, we're all set.
Nothing like the rustic wholesomeness of working with one's own hands.
There.
Finished.
And only six missing pieces.
Those Swedes know how to put in almost everything you need.
Man, I'm sore all over.
I feeI like I just went 10 rounds with mighty Thor.
I feeI like I was mauled by Jesus.
I've got just the thing.
Genuine miracle cream I bought from a traveling salesman.
"Come one, come all! " he said.
"Step right up! " "This sounds too good to be true," I thought.
He said I looked like a smart young man! "So is it a deaI?" I inquired.
Two hours later, he was gone with 60 of my dollars! But I had the miracle cream.
Bad news, nobody.
The super-collider super exploded! I need you to take it back and exchange it for a wobbly CD rack and some of those rancid meatballs.
Excuse me.
Hi.
Do you have a minute? I live in Jersey City.
My car broke down, and my aunt's sick.
She needs this medicine, but I need bus money, so I'm mugging you.
- Hand over your wallets! - I don't believe that story for a second.
- It doesn't matter, I'm mugging you! - There's no bus to Jersey City.
Give me your wallets now, or my robot will shoot! Don't make me hurt you.
I'm too scared to find my pocket.
Here, I'll just take off my pants and give you those.
Hey! I don't like what I'm seeing! Give it to him, Andrew! Give it to him again, Andrew! What the-? Laser-proof shirts, huh? Well, I'll show you! Hey! Quit it! - Foiled.
And after years of planning.
- You're out of the gang.
How did we manage to survive? What gave us those strange powers? Maybe we're wearing magic rings, but they're invisible so we don't even realize it.
Also, you can't feeI the rings.
Fry! Shut up and look at this! "May cause super powers in humans.
" Wow! A super-powers drug you can just rub into your skin? You'd think you'd have to freebase it.
Let's see, which powers do we have? "Super strength"? - Yep.
- "Lickity speed"? Check.
- Yes, sir.
"Ability to command the loyalty of sea creatures.
" - Hey, Zoidberg, get in here! Screw you! - Ain't got that.
- Nope.
Wow! Super powers! I'll be able to pack my day with twice as many humdrum activities.
Leela, I think you're missing the big picture.
When you were a kid, what was your biggest fantasy? - To have parents.
- Whatever.
The correct answer is, to be a superhero! We have super powers, and we're Americans.
This is our chance.
Hm.
I have been looking for a way to serve the community that incorporates my violence.
- Let's do it! - You'll barely regret this.
Hey! A friend of mine said he mugged you today, and you had super powers! It's true.
Thanks to this funky-fresh cream.
Now me and Leela are forming an awesome crime-fighting duo! Wow! Crime fighting! CooI! You say you're a duo? Yeah, duos are good.
Of course, sometimes they're a little short-handed.
See you.
With two humans, you'd think there'd be a robot in there to balance things out.
But whatever.
I have these three costumes you could use, but I guess I'll just throw one away.
We'd love to have you on the team.
But aren't you more on the supply side of crime? Plus, the cream won't give you super powers.
You're a robot.
So? I'm already super strong, and my arms do this: Also, I got this going: Listen up, New New York! There's a new group of superheroes in town! - And we're- Quiet! It's 4 a.
m and I just fell asleep for the first time in 30 years! Sorry! - A new era of justice has begun.
What? Attention all crooks, lowlifes and lawbreakers.
Do yourselves a favor and crawl back into your filthy tenements you human cockroaches, or get your ugly face punched to custard by the New Justice Team! - Captain Yesterday! - Clobberella! And Super King! The best one of the three! Yow! Ta-da! Captain Yesterday, I find your skintight high-waters incredibly sexy.
Let's get together sometime.
Sure! I'm listed in the phone book, so once I reveaI my reaI name along with my address and a copy of my birth certificate- Are you crazy? We have to keep our secret identities secret.
- From everybody? - Especially from everybody! Give severaI reasons why.
For one, superheroes cause a lot of collateraI damage and we don't want to get our butts sued.
Or do we? No, I guess not.
Also, if our identities get out, every crook in the city will be after us.
- Or, God forbid, our loved ones.
- Super King has no need for loved ones.
How you doing, kid? There you go.
Two one-day mutant surface passes.
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