Well, this is awful.
I can't believe we're spending Charlie's birthday in jail.
Well, as long as we're all in here together, let's go over some ground rules.
This is just a chair.
- Well, what if I - Uh-uh.
- What if - Hold it.
Guys, it could be worse.
Mom and dad could know we're here.
- Kids? - Uh-oh.
Hi, mom.
Hi, dad.
- Hi.
- Hey.
Nice family you got here.
I'm guessing the dog is in the pound? We don't have a dog, officer "snootee.
" It's pronounced "snoo-tay.
" - Get in there, you two.
- Here.
What are you guys doing here? What are you guys doing here? Okay, before we get to that, let's go over the ground rules again.
Dad, I want you to pay extra close attention.
Day's all burnt toast Running late, and dad jokes Has anybody seen my left shoe? I close my eyes, take a bite Grab a ride, laugh out loud There it is up on the roof I've been there, I've survived So just take my advice Hang in there, baby Things are crazy But I know your future's bright Hang in there, baby There's no maybe Everything turns out all right Your life is up and down But trust me it comes back around You're gonna love who you turn out to be Hang in there, baby.
So my kids are in jail.
- Anybody wanna tell me why? - Nope, we're good.
Well, what about you? Why are you guys in jail? Hey, we asked you first.
Start talking.
All right well, as the oldest I guess I owe you guys an explanation.
It's all Teddy's fault.
- What? It is not! - Oh really? We wouldn't be here if you hadn't promised Charlie a birthday present you couldn't deliver.
Well, Charlie, here you are, watching your favorite tv show, "the gurgles.
" That's the sound we make if we march in circles and watch you play along just sit down, annoy your mom and sing the gurgle song, gurgles! it's kind of annoying, but I guess it's entertaining to your little brain.
Oh, "the gurgles!" What did I miss? - I love gurgles.
- Shh! So if we're having a contest for who gives Charlie the best birthday present ever, I'll accept my prize now.
Okay well, I gave her the gift of life, so let's see what you got.
I'm getting her tickets to the gurgles concert.
- Oh! - Yeah.
I want her to have a great second birthday, unlike mine when I didn't get the gift I wanted.
Here we go, still whining about a heo doggy.
Howdy puppy, the rootinest tootinest little chihuahua in the West.
I wanted him more than anything in the world and I Oh, too soon.
Hey, how are you coming with the entertainment? Entertainment.
Entertainment? For Charlie's birthday party.
- What did you decide on? - Ah.
Still thinking.
Noodling.
A lot of things going on in the old hopper.
The hopper's empty, isn't it, Bob? I I don't even know where it is anymore.
Honey, Charlie's party is in three days.
Oh, honey, come on, relax.
I'll think of something.
Okay, we'll do a clown, a bouncy house whatever.
Bob, honey, you have to reserve those things.
We have to decide on something good or it's gonna be hello doggy all over again.
Howdy puppy! - Hey, can I check my email? - No no no no no.
I'm about to buy gurgles concert tickets online.
They go on sale in eight seconds and I'm gonna be the first one to get them.
Okay, here we go.
Three, two, one.
What? Sold out?! Oh, you've gotta be kidding me.
Hang on.
Let me get in there.
Let's see.
- What are you doing? - Checking my email.
What? Give me that.
How am I gonna get the tickets now? Well, the other day I was listening to that radio station for kids, k.
I.
D.
Z.
Hey, kidz.
I just got that.
Why are you listening to the kidz radio station? Because they told me not to change the channel.
Anyway, they're having a contest.
Whoever makes the best video wins tickets to the gurgles concert.
We could make a great video.
All we need is one good idea.
Oh okay, how about this? So we make a video of me putting on And then I turn around and on my butt it says.
"I heart the gurgles.
" Yeah, that's not it.
I've I've got an idea.
I've written some really great kid songs.
We could turn one of those into a video.
One good idea.
Just one good idea.
I have got a song about talking toes that will knock your socks off.
You get it? 'Cause it okay.
Okay, we're still going through all the bad ideas.
But we need a good one, and Charlie should be the star of it.
Well, I've always wanted to shoot her out of a cannon.
All right, still emptying out all those bad ideas, okay.
No cannons? No underpants? You're really tying my hands here.
Hey hey, honey! Honey! Hey, come on.
Come in here.
Come on.
- I've got something I wanna show you.
- What is it? I wanna show you the entertainment I got for Charlie's party.
Voila.
A little cart.
This is why I'm missing "judge ira"? Oh my, I seemed to have put the cart before the Horse! Are you sure it's a horse? I've seen bigger dogs.
Actually, I've seen bigger cats.
Honey, it's a miniature horse.
Well, he is kind of cute.
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