6. The Ricks Must Be Crazy (第2季)【完整台词】

Geez, I can't believe we found a version of Earth with a "Ball Fondlers" movie franchise.

I can't believe the things this reality considers PG-13.

- Yeah.

I-I'm pretty jealous.

- Don't be, Morty.

There's pros and cons to every alternate timeline fun facts about this one-- It's got giant, telepathic spiders, 11 9/11s, and the best ice cream in the multiverse! - Shut up! - We go get some ice cream, mother[bleep]! Oh, great.

Oh, boy.

W-what's wrong, Rick? Is it the quantum carburetor or something? "Quantum carburetor"? Jesus, Morty.

You can't just add a-- Sci-Fi word to a car word and hope it means something.

Huh, looks like something's wrong with the microverse battery.

- We're gonna have to go inside.

- Um, go inside what? The battery, Morty.

Be right back, Summer.

Stay put, don't touch any buttons, and ignore all random thoughts that feel spidery.

Wait! You can't leave me here! You'll be fine.

Ship, keep Summer safe.

Keep Summer safe.

Ohh! Ugh.

Wonderful.

Hey, excuse me.

Hello.

Um What, you think you're better than me?! Nobody's better than me! Hey! Hey! Aah! Aaaaah! - Keep Summer safe.

- Aaaaaaah! Hey, man, what the hell?! That was my daughter's pediatrician! Aah! No, stop! Don't kill him! Confirmed.

Aah! Oh, God.

I can't feel my legs.

Help! Help!! - Summer is safe.

- I don't feel safe.

Confirmed.

No.

Oh, God, help me.

Help me! Help me, please! You can help me! Oh, man.

Where are we, Rick? Morty, remember eight seconds ago when when you said, "Go inside what?" And I said, "The battery"? And then we showed up here, and I wasn't like, "Whoa, this is unexpected.

This is not what I was expecting, Morty.

- What a perplexing mystery this is.

" - All right, all right.

We're inside the battery.

I get it.

- You don't have to bust my balls.

- Huh, this isn't right.

This pipe's supposed to be sending up to the engine, Morty.

Instead we've got zero? Now what are these people doing? W-w-w-whoa, people? It's time for some hands-on engine repair.

- All right, Morty, hold on to something.

- Whoa! Holy crap! I thought we were inside your car battery, Rick.

T-t-this is like a whole p-planet or something.

Thanks, Morty.

I'm pretty proud of this bad boy.

Check it out.

I put a spatially tessellated void inside a modified temporal field until a planet developed intelligent life.

I then introduced that life to the wonders of electricity, which they now generate on a global scale.

And, you know, some of it goes to power my engine and charge my phone and stuff.

You have a whole planet sitting around making your power for you? That's slavery.

It's society.

They work for each other, Morty.

They pay each other.

They buy houses.

They get married and make children that replace them when they get too old to make power.

That just sounds like slavery with extra steps.

Ooh-la-la, someone's gonna get laid in college.

It appears we are being revisited by the alien known as Rick, who once gave our world the gift of gooble box technology, which, when stomped on, generates electricity, powering our homes and businesses, improving our daily lives, while safely removing the dangerous waste power to a special disposal volcano.

But why has Rick returned? And what will he say when he hears the big news? Let's find out.

You need to tell these people they're in a battery, Rick.

It's messed up.

There's caterers down there.

Th-th-they're setting up chafing dishes.

Would you relax, Morty? There's nothing dishonest about what we're doing.

Now slap on these antennae.

- These people need to think we're aliens.

- What? Why? Obviously you really know nothing about car repair.

Wait for the ramp, Morty.

They love the slow ramp.

Really gets their dicks hard when they see this ramp just slowly extending down.

Greetings! Morty, you got to flip them off.

I told them it means "Peace among worlds.

" How hilarious is that? Coming through.

Two real aliens walking through here.

Rick, our alien friend.

Uh, Mr.

President, um, couldn't help but notice that you were having problems generating power.

That's correct.

We've evolved.

Our most brilliant scientist, Zeep Xanflorp, has developed a source of energy that makes gooble boxes obsolete.

I would love to see it.

[Bleep] you.

What did you say to me?! "[Bleep] you.

" Y-you told me it means "much obliged".

Oh.

Right.

Uh, b-blow me.

No, no, no.

Blow me.

Zeep, you have an honored guest from beyond the stars.

I said 12 quantum stabilizers, not 11.

Fix it or it's your ass.

Chris, I'm in the middle of something.

Zeep, is Rick-- The alien.

Rick the alien.

Rick the alien Really? You're gonna pull that move? I guided your entire civilization.

Your people have a holiday named Ricksgiving.

They teach kids about me in school.

I dropped out of school.