-Are you okay? -Yes.
I have to find somewhere to hide.
Well, you can hide with us.
Rick? -Yeah? -Do you think we could take -- -w-what's your name? -Arthrisha.
Could we take arthrisha up in the ship and, you know, just wait out the purge? Oh, Morty, how can I refuse after all you've done to blackmail me? Your vehicle -- is it from the gods? -No.
-Yes.
So, uh, you know, when the purge started, did people get into it right away, or were they like, "wait, what? This is gonna stop crime how, exactly?" Yeah, it took some time for people to accept it.
Yeah, I bet.
[ Chuckles ] I bet.
Yeah, it's kind of like cellphones, you know? At first, everyone was like, "look at those douchebags purging," and then the next thing you know, they're like, "it's just so convenient.
" Geez, you working on your tight five for the comedy store, Morty? Whatcha doing? Watching some TV, playing on your phone? -Is that a real question? -Just making conversation.
Are you? What part of that gives me anything to work with? My choice is to say nothing, be sarcastic, or bark "yes" like a trained animal.
It's not a conversation.
You're holding me verbally hostage.
Okay, ass-face.
I'll go in the kitchen.
-Hey, dad.
-Yeah? Whatcha doing? Going into the kitchen? Okay.
-Yeah, you like that? -Screw you.
So, uh, do most people wear masks when they purge? I-I don't want to answer any more purge questions.
All right, hey, hey, that's cool.
I can roll with that.
[ Blowing raspberries ] -[ Gasps ] My Nana! -Huh? My Nana! We have to save her! You just now remembered your Nana exists.
I-I was traumatized.
Haven't you been through like 15 purges? I mean, some as a child? Will somebody just help me get her? Fine, whatever.
Morty, stay.
Oh, God.
Oh, crap.
Oh, crap! -Get out! Get out! -Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa! Get the [Bleep] out of the flying machine! Oh, my God! O-okay! Okay! -Back up, asshole.
-[ Whimpers ] -Back up.
-Ohh.
-Back the [Bleep] up! -Aah! For what it's worth, I'm sorry, but that's not really worth anything tonight, is it? Y-you can't leave us here.
You're killing us! You hear me? Come back.
Y-you got to come back.
Change your mind.
Oh, geez.
Morty! Aah! [Bleep] Amish bitch shot me! [ Grunts ] She tried to purge me, Morty.
You let your wiener do the walking, and now I'm dead.
-Rick, she took the car! -You [Bleep] kidding me, Morty?! She took my car and the gun.
We're like the rest of these assholes now.
W-w-we're gonna get purged, Morty.
Help me up.
Oh, geez, geez! Wait a minute, Rick.
Why don't we just use your portal gun? It's in the car, dip-ass.
[ Grunts ] Oh, God, it hurts.
She got me right in the goddamn liver, Morty.
It's the hardest-working liver in the galaxy, Morty, and now it has a hole in it.
I hope it was worth it.
I was just trying to do right.
Yeah, well, that's not really the theme of tonight's party.
Heads up.
Rapists.
Well, don't just stand there, Morty.
-Purge 'em.
-Me? No, me.
Should I rub my liver hole on them? Pick up a stick or something and kill them.
-Um, w-we come in peace.
-[ Screaming ] Oh, my God.
[ Grunts ] There's more where that came from! You want to get purged, you bring it! Drop [Belches] drop your shit! Drop it all.
Morty, go get their shit.
Hurry up.
I only had one of those things I threw.
I'm holding a box of tic tacs right now.
-Want some crackers? -No, thank you.
Are you ready to be nice to me? In exchange for crackers? -What happened to you? -Dad, get a job.
You're trying to create drama because you're bored.
Oh.
[ Beeping, whirring ] It's the space phone grandpa gave us.
-Hello? -Hey, Summer, it's grandpa.
I need you to do me a favor.
-I can barely hear you.
-Who is it? Morty and I are on a planet that's purging.
-I need you to take down -- -a plan that's what? We're on a planet that's purging, Summer.
Purging.
We lost our car and my gun, and we're in a purge.
-Ooh, is it taddi Mason? -Like the movie "the purge"? Yes, I-I need you to take -- -that movie sucked.
-Oh, my God.
Hold on.
It's not taddi Mason? Dad, who the [Bleep] is taddi Mason? -My friend.
-Aah! Are you okay? I'm putting you on speaker.
-Taddi? -Yes, Jerry, it's taddi, a person no one's ever heard of until now, calling you on a space phone.
I can't tell if you're being sarcastic.
[ Growls ] Aah! [ Growling ] [ Gunshots ] Reload, fast.
Summer, w-we need you to take down this number.
-Quit screwing around.
-Morty? Are you all right? -No! -Why are you with taddi Mason? Holy [Bleep] dad! Shut the [Bleep] up! Okay.
I guess I'm just this entire family's toilet paper.
Are you writing this down? Will you please write this down? -Summer: Yes, yes.
-7-7-1-9-8 [ Growling ] 3-6-4-2-1-1-2-5.
Aah! [ Growling ] You son of a bitch! Morty, I don't want to be the "a little help" guy, but a little help? -Aah! -Okay, I have a pen.
Go.
A spoon, Morty? -A spoon?! -I'm sorry.
There's a pile of silverware next to you, and you throw me the one thing that can never kill anything? All right, okay! Summer, on the shelf above my workbench in the garage, there's a red box with a keypad on it.
You're gonna take that box outside, and you're gonna type the number I just gave you into the keypad.
-Got it? -Got it.
Is it just part of growing up to hate your dad? I'm ignoring you.
Morty, if I can get to the top of that lighthouse, I can send the beacon, and your sister can launch our package.
Just remember, if there's people in there and they try to purge us, we got to purge them first.
We're not purging anyone, Rick, all right? W-will you stop it? Morty, if we're gonna survive tonight, you're gonna need to harness your repressed rage.
I don't have any! Spoken like a person with repressed rage.
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