Oh, all my friends are here.
- Madam President, hello.
- Merry Christmas.
- Thank you so much for having us.
- Hello, Congressman Jaeger.
- And this must be Mrs.
Jaeger?
- That's not his wife.
- Okay.
- This is one of my staffers, Nadia.
- She's a prostitute.
- Hmm.
Well, would you like a picture for
your friends and for your family?
- Yes
- We've got a
There we go.
No.
And I want to wish you
a merry Christmas.
And I can count on
your support, can't I?
100%.
Merry Christmas.
- Wonderful, thank you.
- And Happy New Year.
Nadia, let's go.
This is Congressman Baines from Arizona.
He's solidly O'Brien.
Oh, let's get a picture.
There we go.
And you're out of here.
You can go.
Catherine's 23 years old.
She's fair game.
Maybe you ride the pine on
this one for a period or two.
- Please?
- All right, I'll talk to everyone.
- I owe you.
- I mean, I'd hate to be offsides.
- What?
- You know, hockey.
Hockey.
Great sport.
Thank you.
Mike, are you dating a
hockey player by any chance?
You noticed the hockey references?
Shit, I thought they were seamless.
Listen, you can't say a word,
but our surrogate is pregnant
and I've been talking
to somebody in the NHL
about a job as director
of communications.
So win or lose, I'm out of here.
Well, let me get my good-byes
out of the way now.
Congressman, the president would love to
have a clutch with you in the Green Room.
- Oh, of course.
- Great.
- Hey.
- Hi.
Carson City, Nevada.
Ah, Buddy Calhoun
in a tie that's not made out of string.
You're the only woman
who's ever threatened
to grate my balls over
a bowl of spaghetti.
- Night's still young.
Knock yourself out.
- Well, yeah.
Madam President, we are looking to
build a 9/11 memorial in Bozeman.
That sounds superb.
Wonderful, because, you
know, never forget.
- That's right.
- Always remember.
But can you remind me
exactly what happened
in Bozeman on 9/11?
This is mainly focused
on our first responders.
Oh, that's so important.
Our first responders were
terribly traumatized
by what happened to the first
responders in New York.
Yeah, I get that.
That's, uh
- Wow.
- That's wow.
Yeah, Ben.
You know, I am sure there
is a little something
we can find somewhere for
such a great project, sir.
Roger, what do you think?
Oh, I'm sure we can just
slip it under the skirt
of the Homeland Security budget.
Tell him why, Will.
The budget has a fatter, more
womanly behind than myself.
Excuse me.
Aren't you Gary Walsh?
- What did I do?
- You've got to come meet my daughter.
- She saw you in "The Hill.
"
- Oh.
She's single, divorced, has a kid.
- But he's really a sweetheart.
- Oh, how nice.
God, I feel like somebody's
playing a trick on him.
They're about to dump a bucket
of pig's blood on his head.
- (MUSIC PLAYING)
- (CHATTER)
- You having a good time, Amy?
- Eh.
Can't believe how many compliments
I'm getting about the hot list.
(LAUGHS)
Don't people around here
have anything better
to talk about than the stupid hot list?
- Amy, do you want some advice?
- Definitely not.
Listen, don't worry so much
about what's up here, okay?
Worry about what's in here.
And if you work at that,
I'm telling you, you're gonna
be back on the hot list, Amy.
I'm not saying you're
gonna be in the top 20,
but you would be a
lock for, like, mid 40s.
Thank you.
Look at him, he's smiling like his
shit's all pine-fresh smelling.
Oh, okay.
- What are you doing?
- What?
You're looking at
yourself in the mirror?
- You look wonderful.
- Yeah.
WOMAN: Madam President.
This is Connie DiBenedetto of Oregon.
She's the chairman of the
Gay and Lesbian Caucus.
Actually, she's the only member
of the Gay and Lesbian Caucus.
I'd like to take just
a moment of your time
to talk to you about your
environmental policy.
Oh, yes.
Uh-huh.
- I know it's politically risky
- Come this way.
but, you know, a carbon
tax is the only way to go.
- Yeah, you've met my daughter Catherine?
- No.
And this is her special friend Marjorie.
I want to get a picture of all of us.
No, Mom, we don't want
to take any photos.
Sure, we do.
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