9. A First Woman (第6季)【完整台词】

- Okay, thank you, Tiffany.

- I'm going! - Amy: Knock 'em dead, ma'am.

- Thank you! - Have fun.

How long have you been working for "The Tonight Show"? - About a month.

- Richard: Hey, ma'am.

Ma'am, Catherine's in an ambulance.

- She's having some bad bleeding.

- Oh, my God, on the couch? - Did they put the garbage bags down? - I don't know.

- Okay, and? - One of us should go? Well, what are you standing here for? - You're the donor.

- Oh, father.

- Do you need to leave? - Where do I stand? - Oh, right there on the mark.

- On the thing? Okay.

Thank you.

- Man: Good luck, ma'am.

- Hi.

How are you? the first woman to hold the office of the president.

If that's not enough, she's written an autobiography "A Woman First: First Woman.

" - Ladies and gentlemen, please help me welcome - (gasps) - President Selina Meyer! Selina! - (cheering, applause) Hey! Ah! Whoo! How about that? - Hello.

- Hey.

Great.

- Thank you so much for coming.

- Thank you! How about this, a real president! A real president.

- Where to? - 53rd and 3rd, please.

- (sighs) - (jingle plays) Hi, there.

Welcome to "CBS This Ride.

" I'm your host, Dan Egan, - bringing you exclusive content - Oh, no, no, no, no.

Off.

right here in New York City Yellow Cabs.

Sir, how do you I can't get the screen to go off.

Come on, how the fuck do you turn this thing off?! There's an off you see the off button? All right, you know what? You know what? I wanna get out.

Shut the fuck up! Sir, can you calm down, please? Broadway is your scene, Fringe Festival's in town.

God damn it.

Ben, it's me.

- Driver: Hey, you gonna pay? - I'm in.

I did wanna clear the air about one thing.

Sure.

Earlier this week, you were booked on the show.

You had to cancel, which, to us, is like, you know, she's the President of the United who cares? We're fine with it.

You have so many more important things to do - Well, thank you.

- than our stupid show that we put together with Scotch tape here.

No, it's a great show.

- No, I love this show.

- And then there was speculation that you did so because you were embarrassed about some salacious news stories about your trainer.

Yes, in sleeping with my trainer, - I did not exercise good judgment.

- (audience laughs) Wow.

Ha, ha, ha! (imitates sword slashing) Zinger! Actually, what I really would love to talk about, um, is Tibet.

- Yeah, absolutely, Madam President.

- The deal that we brokered.

But before that, just in honor of your new book - Oh, sure.

- "A Woman First: First Woman.

" Is that the final title or are you, uh? Yeah.

Oh, yeah, that mm-hmm.

(chuckles) - It's a little pun.

- It is a pun, kind of.

By the way, this is quite a photo on the cover.

- It's really, really nice.

- Thank you.

Do I need, like, special glasses - to be able to see this in focus? - No, no! Or how does this work? It just came out today, and we thought it would be fun, in honor of you canceling on us, to have some children come out here.

They'll read you some of our favorite reviews - of your book.

- Oh, neat! Because as any parent knows, kids read the darndest things off of cue cards.

That's right.

So, kids, could you come out here, please? - Oh, so cute.

- Yeah, very cute.

Starting up here, we've got Ella, who is age nine.

"'The New York Times' says, 'We've been stunned by the revelations and achievements of the Meyer presidency over the last few days.

Why aren't they in the book?'" Host: That's not a bad question.

Next up, Melanie, age eight.

"'Publisher Weekly' calls it 'Scattered and disjointed, much like the Meyer presidency.

'" - Okay, next up, we got Ruby, age 10.

- Wow.

"The 'New York Post' says, 'Remainder City.

'" - (host chuckles) Whoa.

- Can we play "What's What's in the Bag"? Let's guess what's in the bag.

We played that last night when you weren't here.

- Ah.

- We've got Elliot, age 10.

Elliot: "'The New Yorker' called it 'A trite, monotonous tune that's as inconsequential as any'"