I like her.
She's funny.
MEEMAW: You're gonna love Ira.
He's a great guy.
Is he your boyfriend?
Well, he's one of them,
so let's not bring that up.
(MEEMAW CHUCKLES)
- (CHUCKLING): Hey.
- MEEMAW: Is this a good time?
Absolutely.
Come in, come in.
Ira, this is my grandson Sheldon.
Sheldon, this is my friend Ira.
- Hello.
- Howdy.
So Meemaw tells me you're Jewish.
Right to it, huh?
All right, let's do this.
Please, sit down.
Thank you so much for helping out.
Aw, Connie, you know, anything for you.
So, Sheldon,
you hungry?
You want a nosh?
I don't know, I've never eaten a nosh.
(CHUCKLING):
Uh, no, a nosh isn't a thing,
it's a never mind.
Um, would you care for some hard candy?
Are they kosher?
Who are you, my mother?
(LAUGHS)
All right, so what can I do for you?
What's it like to be Jewish?
Oh, it's terrible.
I don't recommend it.
- Why?
- Well, for starters,
your life is hemmed in
by ancient, pointless rules.
There's a lot of yelling, and, uh,
you're probably not gonna get
into a good country club.
What about God?
What about him?
Does he play a part in your life?
Well, historically, he's gotten
a kick out of punishing us.
What about Jesus?
He was Jewish.
Oh, we've got a lot of celebrities.
Uh, we've got, uh,
we got William Shatner,
and Leonard Nimoy
Kirk and Spock?
I want to be Jewish.
(LAUGHS) Hold on a second.
Hold I got a question
for you, Sheldon.
When you grow up, are you
planning on living in Texas?
Probably.
Then I strongly advise you
to stay Baptist.
Maybe even wear a cross.
Why did you move to Texas?
Well, that's simple.
Medford had no Jews,
so there was an opening for one.
And you got it? Good for you.
(IRA CHUCKLES)
I love this kid.
Me, too.
Mwah.
Hey.
How's it going?
Good.
Did you know that
Zoroaster believed in two gods?
No, I did not.
And the Taoists don't
believe in God at all.
They believe in a principle of harmony.
How very nice for them.
Shelly, I understand
you enjoy researching things.
Love it.
But it's important to keep in mind
that there is only one true God.
That's called monotheism.
I have a book about it
if you're interested.
That's okay, I have the book about it.
Would you be angry with me
if I don't pick your religion?
I could never be angry with you.
You be a seeker of your own truth.
Thanks, Mom.
And if the truth turns out to be Satan,
I will do battle with him.
(INSECTS CHIRPING)
MALE VOICE: Welcome, Sheldon.
FEMALE VOICE: We've
been waiting for you.
Are you the Ten Commandments?
No.
We are one.
And zero.
We are the binary code
that underlies the universe.
The ten thing is a common mistake.
I want to understand God.
Can you help me?
Did you not hear what we just said?
It's a binary universe.
God is yes and no.
Left and right.
On and off.
Something and nothing.
Positive and negative.
Male and female.
Light and dark.
But why is there evil and suffering?
Well, without evil and suffering,
there is no good and happiness.
Oh, sure.
Binary.
Shall we give him the
final piece of information
that unlocks the secret of the universe?
Why not?
At least one human being should
know the reason for everything.
Sheldon,
before the universe began
GEORGE JR.
: Hey, dummy.
You're drooling all over your books.
Huh?
No.
Zero was about to tell me
the secret and you ruined it.
ADULT SHELDON: I never heard
from One and Zero again.
Although, I was once visited
by Nine when I had chickenpox.
He was a lot less funny
than he thought he was.
PASTOR JEFF:
Okay, "What God means to me.
"
Who'd like to go first?
Billy.
I'd like to go third.
All righty.
Who's feeling brave?
Missy.
I'll go second.
Great.
Does anybody want to go first?
I'll go.
Okay.
Come on up here, Sheldon.
Let's hear what you got.
I've spent the last week
studying what people believe,
and I've come to a conclusion.
And what's that?
- I'm starting my own religion.
- I'm sorry, what?
I'm calling it Mathology.
It's based on a universal binary system.
That's terrific, Sheldon, but
this is a Baptist Sunday school.
I know, I'm here to convert everybody.
- Any takers?
- Okay.
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所属电视剧:Young Sheldon (2017)
11. Demons, Sunday School and Prime Numbers 全部台词 (一共 4 页)
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