21. A Broken Heart and a Crock Monster (第2季)【完整台词】

What's he doing here? Y'all getting a divorce? No.

No, he's just here for dinner.

Oh.

Welcome, Your Holiness.

I thought you were hanging out with Veronica tonight.

We were supposed to, but then she invited a bunch of her choir friends over, and it turned into a stupid Bible study.

- No offense.

- None taken.

- Hmm.

- Honestly, I do not understand the female mind.

Do something.

Georgie, why don't you go eat dinner in front of the TV? No, it's all right.

Sounds like Georgie's having trouble navigating the perilous waters of a relationship.

Believe me, I can understand.

You having problems with your hot wife? Maybe I'll go eat by the TV.

I'm liking my crock monster.

Mmm.

Me, too.

I can't taste anything after the lemon water.

I'm glad y'all are having a good time.

You're welcome.

Where we having dinner tomorrow? Nowhere.

Dr.

Sturgis and I are going to Louisiana, do a little gambling.

So a donation could be forth coming? Don't jinx me.

It's my first time going to a casino.

It's amazing.

There's bright lights and bells and buzzers and people yelling.

Ugh.

Veronica says I'm the nicest guy she knows.

She also says she only wants to date nice guys.

- Does that mean she wants to date me? - I bet she doesn't.

No, she does not.

Doesn't make any sense.

Nothing they do makes any sense.

- I know - At least he's not crying anymore.

Devil's got something to do with it.

Mary, George, I can't thank you enough for this.

It was our pleasure.

So, Pastor, are you gonna try and talk things out with Selena? Well, we're really not on speaking terms, so I'll just be heading back to my office, sleep on the couch.

That's ridiculous.

He can stay with us, can't he? Uh, I guess that'd be okay.

- Of course it would.

- Oh.

I couldn't possibly impose.

Sure you could.

In fact, you can take my room.

Well, y'all are too kind.

- Hello.

- Oh.

Did y'all have a good time? - Yes.

- It was great.

Oh, Mom, Pastor Jeff is gonna be spending the night.

If the kids could sleep at your place? No.

Bye.

George.

What? What's wrong? The pastor's up making tea.

What, you want me to blow on it? Go talk to him.

About what? I don't know.

Maybe you could give him a male perspective on relationship issues.

How about this? What if I close my eyes and pray on it? Hey.

Oh, hi.

I hope I didn't wake you.

Uh, no, no.

Just get-getting some water.

Can I fix you some chamomile? No, thanks.

So Tough times, huh? Yeah.

Yeah.

Hey, uh, does the Bible say anything about heartache and such? Psalm 147, verse three: "The Lord healeth the broken in heart, and bindeth up their wounds.

" Well, there you go-eth.

Except I'm feeling kicked in the nethers right now, and he sure is taking his sweet time with the healing.

He takes his sweet time about a lot of things.

Uh, not that I'm complaining.

You know, his will, not mine, et cetera.

You know, one thing I can say is that having a happy marriage is it's hard work.

Oh, I know.

As the pastor, people come to me with relationship problems all the time.

Bet you hear some juicy ones, huh? "Juicy" doesn't begin to describe it.

- Oh give me a sample.

- I can't.

There's strict pastor-flock confidentiality.

Sure.

Sure.

Mm.

Mary doesn't tell you things about us, does she? I'm not at liberty to say.

But she does, doesn't she? - Yeah.

- Yeah.

These people clearly don't know what ten percent means.

What are you talking about? This is the list of all the people who belong to the church and how much money they donate.

Dorothy and Fred Nelson gave a dollar last week.

- So? - They own the Piggly Wiggly.

They can afford to give much more.

Weird.

You say "Piggly Wiggly" and suddenly I'm hungry.

Really? You're drinking in the morning now? What? Oh, look at that.

Felt later.

Hey, I haven't seen the pastor.

He go home? He hasn't come out of Georgie's room.

Maybe he found Georgie's magazines.

He's a man of God.