21. A Broken Heart and a Crock Monster (第2季)【完整台词】

You're adorable.

I have stories.

Come back here.

- It's my favorite table.

- Oh, hey, Connie.

Hi, Felicia.

Chip me for a deuce.

How's your daughter doing? Oh, surgery went great.

Thanks for asking.

Her daughter got kicked by a horse.

- They had to pin a couple of bones together.

- Oh, my.

She won't be stealing any more horses for a little while.

- Your usual, Connie? - Yeah.

John, you want something? I would like a Fresca, please.

- Got it, hon.

- Connie.

Duke-North Carolina's about to start.

Want a piece? Yeah, baby.

Give me the points on Duke for a nickel.

- All right.

- A nickel.

That's a silly bet.

It's 50 bucks.

A thousand nickels.

Less silly.

I must say, uh this is a side of you I've never seen before.

You're all right with it, aren't you? Oh, sure.

When are you gonna give that man your $50? Don't worry about it.

Hit me.

I'm a little worried.

Pastor Jeff? Everything all right in there? Oh, yeah.

I've just been praying, napping, crying.

I like to mix it up.

Well, how's it going? Good, actually.

I have this feeling inside that I should head home.

Well, then you got to honor that feeling, that's God.

You're right.

You want to come with? Do you really want me there while you patch things up with your wife? She's less likely to throw any steak knives if we have company.

Um if you think it'll help, I suppose Great, let's hit it.

Oh Hello, is this the Nelson residence? Oh, good.

I'm Sheldon Cooper, the executive assistant secretary at the First Baptist Church of Medford.

I'm looking through our donation records, and I've noticed that you've tapered off a bit.

Well, yes, your children's education is expensive, but so is running a church.

Oh, boy! I'll be sure to tell the pastor.

Goodbye.

That earned a sip of Yoo-hoo.

Okay.

Who's next? Wendy and Bill Mackenzie.

Of Mackenzie Chevrolet? Now those are what we call "deep pockets.

" Pat here, double the ten, and split the aces.

Connie I found an old-fashioned malt shop where we can have milkshakes and listen to the jukebox, like I never did in high school.

Yeah, great.

Not now, John.

Okay, well, I was just hoping we could do something together.

For God's sake, John.

I'm getting my ass kicked here! I'm sorry.

Oh, Felicia, you're killing me.

Chip me another deuce.

Hello? Selena? Ooh.

Big TV, fancy.

"Con amor, Selena.

" Which means? "Life is too short to be married to a loser.

I'm leaving you.

Love, Selena.

" "Love, Selena"? Well, that's kind of a mixed message.

Yeah.

Oh, I couldn't tell you how much to give.

But I can tell you the Stuckeys stepped up for a thousand dollars.

Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm.

Well, you need to give what's comfortable for you.

And of course, I don't need to remind you, it's entirely tax deductible.

And at the next pancake breakfast, you can hold your head high.

Thank you.

That's very generous.

Goodbye.

The pancake line closed it.

We are so going to heaven.

I don't understand why God would tell me to go home just to find out my wife left me.

Not that he needs me to defend him, but in God's defense, he didn't say she'd be there.

Mary, I hate to say this, but I think it's time for me to move on.

I thought even as a teenager, I'd been called to preach the word of God, but maybe that was just my ego.

Maybe I'm not meant to do this.

Don't say that.

You're a great preacher.

Thank you.

But it's clear.

I need to trod a new path.

Well, what would you do? Trodding wise.

I don't know.

Maybe work with my hands amongst men, on an oil rig, or a fishing trawler.

I also know how to blow glass.

I could turn a pretty penny at swap meets.

- Those all sound like solid options.

- Mm-hmm.

Oh, red light, red light! Oh, phooey.

Tell you what, Jody.

Why don't you go upstairs to your daddy's bedroom, and see how much is in his wallet? Don't worry, it's not stealing if it's for God.

What are y'all up to? Just helping Mom with some church work.