Max! Over here at our white trash window.
I need help with shower.
All right, Chestnut we're heading for work, soon.
You know the rules No R-rated movies, no sugary snacks and I want you standing up and asleep by 11.
What's the problem? I can't turn it on.
Well, drop your towel and tell it has a big nozzle.
Did you even do a rat check? Yes Theodore is gone.
Even he got a better apartment.
Max, remind me what separates us from homeless people? We're not as tanned? Yeah, and we have a sometimes functioning shower and that sweet shower curtain.
Hmm, which was gifted to us by a homeless person who no longer needed his cape.
That should do it.
Hey, why'd the sound stop? That's weird.
Ah! - All right.
All right.
- Ugh.
Ugh.
Well, I got it turned on.
What's that, buddy? It doesn't get any sadder? Well, well, well, Caroline, I didn't know it was "bring your boyfriend to work" day.
Even our shower head is broke, Earl.
We got blasted with rusty water and something thick.
Ugh, oh.
I feel so dirty.
Stop.
We showered at Sophie and Oleg's.
That's why I feel dirty.
There was a rubber ducky in there who looked like he'd seen some really messed up stuff.
Look, we will do what we always do when we need a new appliance or a fishnet body stocking.
We'll ask Oleg.
Did somebody say fishnet body stocking? Hey, everybody! I'm going green, and I don't just mean my eye shadow.
Yup, I'm getting my body ready for pregnancy with healthy eating and less smoked meats.
I think going green is more about the environment Sophie.
Oh, yeah? And how many babies have you had, Caroline? Sophie, I wish I were that fetus.
I'm jealous of anything that gets to be inside you for nine months.
You know, Oleg, since Sophie's doing a food cleanse, maybe you could do a cleanse for your potty mouth.
I like that idea.
Since I'm changing for a baby, you should too.
From now on, everything you say should be G-rated.
Yeah, but the G doesn't stand for 'Gina.
So I'm supposed to serve bone-in rib eye and pulled pork and not make any comparison to my junk? Well, I'll be over here eating healthy in my booth.
Max, what are we gonna do without a working shower? Where will I cry? And where will I hide from you? Girls, if you need a shower, there are wonderful facilities at my new gym.
Well, they obviously have child care.
They even give me a 6:15 wake-up call every morning, so I can make it to my ideal body workout.
I'll give you a wake-up call right now.
Sleep in.
With that body, nothing's gonna work out.
Well, I have two "friends and family" one-day passes that I've been saving for my parents' trip but last month they littered in Korea, so they're in jail.
Hey, I found something green on here.
Two pistachio ice creams, please.
Sophie, I'm not sure I Just bring me something green, bitch.
Max, are you in here? Ah, only lady here has been in the shower a long time.
This isn't yours, is it? Nope, and I'm guessing it's not yours either.
It is now.
Girl, why didn't you tell me a shower could be this good? I didn't think you'd believe me, like when I told you they make hangers just for pants.
Have you been in there this whole time? I got out to pee a couple times.
Then I didn't get out to pee a couple times.
While you were meeting water for the first time, I took three classes.
Body Rocket with Papo, Flex Flow with Nat, and Ab Attack with Abby, and I just signed up for Celtic Hip-Hop with Devandre O'Brien.
Yo, can you fit these bad boys in your purse? And, uh, don't forget my new hat.
I'll make room for them next to the hand towels.
Ah, good for you, mami.
So I said to my nanny, "Just take her to the emergency room.
"I cannot miss my workout with Brian because Harlow ate a jar of Play-Doh.
" FYI, bottomless shaving cream in the shower.
Gave myself a Santa beard.
Hi, I wasn't listening in all this tile, your voices really carry.
Who's Brian, and what's this amazing class you're talking about? YBBBB with Brian.
Yoga Booty Ballet Boxing and Beyond.
And it's beyond.
What studio is it in? I'll go.
Max? There's no Max here! One Ab Blast Immune Boost with banana.
Anyone else? Excuse me.
Excuse me.
Can a brother get some bee pollen? Thank you, Brian.
Are you sure you haven't taken Yoga Booty Ballet Boxing and Beyond before? 'Cause it's like your booty just instinctively knew how to go beyond.
Oh, hello, Caroline, and you're Brian.
I've seen your trainer photo on the wall.
I guess it wasn't retouched as I assumed.
Brian, wait up.
Did you forget we're doing Can I buy you a juice? And make out with you? Joke, I'm kinda married.
Yeah.
Caroline, how about I create a juice for you that will optimize your workout? Has he ever bought us a juice? No, and we bought him a car.
Schiller, dude, give me a life boost.
Schiller, I'll have the life boost as well.
Schiller.
Am I saying that right? Schiller.
Will you be in class tomorrow? I'd love to see your flying lotus.
My lotus only has a one-day pass, and it doesn't fly, it takes the bus.
Not anymore.
I got us jobs at the juice bar.
We can take all the classes and showers we want.
I told them I had juicing experience not a lie if you count the week I dated Lance Armstrong.
Earl, this one shower, the water comes at you from every angle, and not because sewage is backing up.
You do seem happier, Max.
You're even kinda smiling.
How high are you right now? No, I am totally clean.
Literally.
Showered Max is a pleasure to be around.
Also, she's much less itchy.
Hello, I'm a member of Physique Total Body.
Swipe, swipe, swipe.
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